Challenging?! Probably the best way to describe things these past few weeks. Had a few rough days and going through another one today.

Anyway I’m still stuck on the crutches around the house and only using the stairs first thing in the morning and last thing at night. Spending most of the day lying on the sofa or sitting propped up with my feet on a foot stool.

Most of my time has been spent studying, getting my latest assignment done and dusted. But today I submitted it for the Friday deadline! All ready to sleep for a bit now but there was music pounding through the house making that impossible so here I am blogging!

Last weekend I got OUT – Major achievement considering everything recently. And yes it’s probably ridiculous that I got so excited about a trip to a supermarket home store, but in my defence I hadn’t been out in the car for weeks! I went round the ground floor of the store in my wheelchair and wearing dark sunglasses, didn’t venture upstairs as I don’t like lifts and couldn’t get up there otherwise! I went a bit mad and bought 3 new tops for my already bulging wardrobe but hey I don’t get out much! And they were in the sale – what girl could resist?

Visited my grandparents on Monday and had lunch there. Not surprisingly I was pretty exhausted most of last week and crashed Thursday night. Not too badly but enough to say I’m going to have to start taking it easy again.

Also had a tearful heart to heart with my Dad and then my Mum on Tuesday about how ill I really am and how little I can do right now. Shared my worries for the future and current ones about studying. It really helped me to get things off my chest and get some reassurance that things will be okay. Whatever happens I’ve got them to help me through.

One friend said to me when I mentioned that I’d been wondering why I put myself through studying: “Easy – you don’t let this illness define you” And I guess they’re right, no matter how tough things get I’m determined this illness isn’t going to stop me. I’ve just got to find that balance between living my life, not letting this illness define me and making sure I get enough rest to improve so I can live a more ‘normal’ life. That in itself is the challenge that faces most people with ME or any chronic illness really.

I’m off to get some of that much needed rest now! As ever feel free to leave a comment or tweet me @smilingclare

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